November 7, 2012 | By | 2 Comments

In order to rent this movie, I drove to one of three remaining Blockbuster videos in the state of Massachusetts. When I got there, I learned of a Disney “vault” where apparently Disney only re-releases certain movies every so often and even then only puts a limited amount of copies in circulation so they can jack up the price.

Unfortunately, Blockbuster had lost their only copy. I don’t have the Internet at home, so I drove around some more and found a Panera so I could watch the video on YouTube. Sorry Disney, I tried to rent your movie, but you didn’t make it available. Now you of all companies, are forcing me to do something of questionable legality! To top it all off, one of my co-worker happened to be at the same Panera, which prompted this exchange:

Her: What are you doing here?
Me: Watching Cinderella
Her: Haha, good one. I’m surprised you’re not watching the election. Really, what are you doing here?
Me: Watching Cinderella

Without further adieu, let’s get going. Cinderella is near and dear to a lot of hearts, so I’m expecting good things. This movie came out 13 years after Snow White. Let’s see what Disney was up to all that time!

2:18 – The evil person is once again a stepmother? That is two Disney Princess movies and two wicked stepmothers! Do any Disney movies exist where the stepmother has even a shred of humanity?

2:37 – We learn that, “Upon the father’s death the stepmother’s true nature was revealed: cold, cruel and bitterly jealous of Cinderella’s charm and beauty.” Wait a second! Snow White’s stepmother was also jealous of her stepdaughter’s beauty. So far, this story is an almost exact replica of Snow White except Cinderella had more family than Snow White ever seemed to have – like a Dad for example.

3:30 – We learn that “Cinderella was abused, humiliated and finally forced to become a servant in her own house. And yet, through it all, Cinderella remained ever gentle and kind. With each dawn she found new hope that some day her dreams of happiness would come true.”

Let’s recap what we know so far: First, Cinderella loses her father. Then, her wicked stepmother shows her true colors. Then, her stepsisters begin mistreating her. Under this situation, I think my dreams of what little happiness I might expect to find would pertain to putting Ms. Drizella in the sleeper hold and giving Anastasia a flying suplex.

3:55 – One of the first scenes with the Princess is once again with a bunch of birds. This movie is a complete Snow White rip-off so far!

4:19 – Cinderella had a wonderful dream, but she can’t say what it was. Thankfully, we know the answer – sleeperhold and flying suplex.

4:33 –Cinderella is singing. Of course she is singing. What would Snow White do? Sing. When does Cinderella come across a bunch of Dwarfs?

6:15 – The animals are helping Cinderella clean. Do you know what other movie that happened in the beginning of? SNOW WHITE!

8:00 – The animals are talking. I don’t remember that happening in Snow White. Maybe this is a different movie.

8:25 – Cinderella even cares for rats. This girl really is above reproach.

10:10 – This cat is clearly evil. Apparently, Disney hates stepmothers, making their movies available to the general public, and now cats.

10:20 – The cat’s name is Lucifer! He is named after the devil!

11:20 – I can’t really blame Disney. I don’t like cats either.

13:34 – The cat is causing trouble again with a bunch of mice. I thought I rented Cinderella, not Tom and Jerry?

15:50 – Cinderella is singing to a horse. Good call making friends with the horse. If Snow White is any indication, when ever there are horses, there you will find Princes in the midst of them.

18:00 – I am hardly paying attention at this point. What do long games between cats and mice have to do with Cinderella and male/female relationships?

19:45 – Cinderella is carrying a tray on her head, which officially makes her our first Princess with superpowers.

20:24 – The wicked stepsister is making Cinderella iron for an hour. I don’t think I’ve ironed for a total of one hour in my entire life.

24:25 – First picture of Mr .Prince and he is riding a horse. Of course he is. This gets me thinking: What is the modern day equivalent of a horse? Is it what car your drive. I drive a Toyota Camry. Do you find that sexy?

27:57 – Cinderella just started chasing the evil cat with her broomstick. She is beginning to unleash her inner Hulk Hogan.

29:00 – We just got word that there is going to be a ball where every eligible maiden is to attend – I think I saw an event like this posted on Craig’s list the other week.

31:11 – Now we have a mouse rapping with Alvin and the Chipmunks on backup.

32:10 – First, the birds/animals/rats made the bed. Now they’re sewing. If there is one thing Disney has taught us, it’s never to underestimate the power of little rodents. Take Mickey Mouse for example.

39:00 – My first moment of truly feeling bad for Cinderella. She gets her hopes up that something good might actually happen, only to get sucked back into the routine of endless work while life passes her by. These Princesses lead awfully lonely lives. Poor Cinderella. 🙁

41:27 – These stepsisters are out of control! They are stripping Cinderella’s clothes off her back. Wicked stepmother doesn’t even seem to be trying to pretend like she cares anymore. Cinderella must have all the self-control in the world. If there were ever a time for a full scale freak-out, now would be the time.

41:40 – Okay, these girls are jerks and I really hate Cinderella’s stepmother. I hope they all live unhappily ever after.

43:00 – Cinderella is balling (not “balling” as in “at a ball” but sobbing). She laments, “I can’t believe. Not anymore. There is nothing left to believe in.” I think we’ve all been there at some point in our live – like when I found out that Wrestling is fake.

44:00 – Just when you think things can’t get any worse for Cinderella, Fairy Godmother appears on the scene! Finally an older woman in a Disney movie who isn’t evil and or/wicked. On the other hand, the men all seem to be either inexplicably absent (Snow White), dead (Cinderella) or devilishly handsome and riding a horse.

I just got kicked out of Panera and am watching the rest of this movie from a McDonald’s parking lot that has free WiFi.

48:40 – Our first scene with the Prince. From his figure, he doesn’t look like he eats at McDonald’s  In fairness to me, I went with the vanilla cone (170 calories) rather than the coffee shake (at least 600 calories).

50:30 – It’s love at first sight again!

53:17 – Lots of intense staring into each other’s eyes – usually not the first thing I do when I meet a complete stranger, but who am I to judge?

54:53 –Prince just rattled off like 6 lines in a row. That is about 6 more lines than the Prince in Snow White.

56:55 – I bet these Castles have wicked heating bills.

63:20 – If there is one thing I’ve learned from these first two movies, it’s that when you’re a Princess (especially a Princess in love) you sing a lot.

65:00 – The Grand Duke is here. I might need to take a Grand Duke after this Vanilla Cone works its way through my system.

69:00 – Lady in the car next to me in the parking lot is giving me strange looks.

72:40 – Wicked stepmother just tripped the Grand Duke to break the glass slipper. I would have expected her to give up by now. She is resilient in her wickedness!

74:05 – The slipper fits and Cinderella and the Prince live happily ever after!!!

Closing thoughts:

All great stories involve great conflicts. With Snow White, there was something of a conflict (Snow White was prettier than her stepmother), but not a whole lot of substance save some cute bonding with the Dwarfs and animals. With the arrival of Cinderella, we start to see a bit more depth, though most of the story again revolves around others being jealous of the protagonist’s outer beauty. This time, however, we learn a bit more of the backstory (i.e. Cinderella’s family of origin).

We also see more conflict in the interpersonal relationships. With the exception of Grumpy to a small degree, Snow White was simply caring for others who cared about her in return. With Cinderella, we see a figure who continues to treat others well, regardless of how she is treated in return. This movie is as much about Cinderella’s good character as it is her good looks. Cinderella clings to the belief that if she continues to be faithful, she will eventually be rewarded. But she isn’t immune to losing hope. At the turning point of the movie, she is essentially all out of the belief that she will ever see goodness in the world – something which kept her going earlier in the film. It is then that the Fairy Godmother comes to the rescue.

Of all the Princess movies, this one seems to resonate the most with my niece. She adores this story so much, it is what made me get so interested in learning about these Princesses in the first place. She asks for it to be read to her over and over again. What is it about these stories that capture the hearts of little girls at such a deep level? As I continue in my search to learn more about the Disney Princesses perhaps even the heart of a precious little girl, I would love to know your thoughts.


Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...

Category: Princess Diaries

Comments (2)

Trackback URL | Comments RSS Feed

  1. Dana says:

    Mark ~ I love that you are doing this… really. You bring a sense of humor and thoughtfulness to the whole princess obsession. My oldest daughter will only watch Cinderella, because she doesn’t like the scariness of the other movies. I do wonder sometimes what these movies are teaching you. Your blog is reminding me again to be thoughtful about what she watches/reads.

    • Mark says:


      Thank you so much! I am both scared and delighted to know that people read this stuff sometimes. It is so nice to get comments like this one!

Leave a Reply

%d bloggers like this: