Bonus Footage and Deleted Scenes
I was in the bathroom shaving and making sure I didn’t miss any spots. I sprayed come cologne, put some gel on my new haircut and was ready to take on the past. That old, familiar chaotic excitement was back for one night. We didn’t turn the clocks back one hour, we turned them back ten years. My closest friends gathered at our house and we took pictures as if we were about to go to the prom. My mom even ironed my pants. As we pulled into the parking lot, I suddenly felt like I used to feel before every basketball game. I felt queasy inside, almost like I wanted to vomit.
What surprised me was the raw emotion that overtook me when I saw everyone. I had spent up to 12 years of schooling and been through so much with these people. Then, on graduation day, everything stopped. I figured I would be with them forever. In a flash, though, everyone was gone. It felt like a long movie with a bunch of characters that I knew very well. The movie went on for years and suddenly ended, with no resolution. It was as if someone walked into the theater turned on the lights and said, “the show is over, it is time for you to leave now”. The trouble is, I didn’t want to leave. I wasn’t ready to leave. The movie wasn’t always a great movie and went on for what seemed like ages and it was full of conflict. But how could it end so suddenly with so much left up in the air?
The trouble with graduation day is that it went so fast. I wanted to talk to all my classmates and share a story and tell them how much they meant to me and how much I would miss them. It’s always hard when you don’t know if someone realizes how much you care. Even the ones who I hadn’t been on the best terms with over the years had played a part in my life. I wanted to wish them success as well.
The earth turns so quietly, it’s easy to forget it is even moving. Sometimes the movie feels like it will never end. The characters, though, are gradually getting older. Time slowly moves fast and life happens so quickly. People come and go and some words of love and healing never get said. Some conflict never gets resolved. Sometimes, a kind word is never spoken to break the cycle of revenge. Both parties miss the closeness they once shared. Deep inside, they want a reconciliation that may never happen.
I can count at least five people from our high school class who have died. Sometimes, you think things will always be the same. That’s when the guy comes in and turns off the movie and says it’s time to go home. I don’t know when he is coming, so I have a new resolve to not only live at peace with my neighbor but to love my neighbor in such a way that my neighbor knows he or she is loved. To make the most of every opportunity and hold onto to everything that is meaningful and precious. To value these things while they last.
For the classmates who were in attendance, I was to some degree able to share how much they mean to me. In some cases, it was ten years in the waiting with much too much silence in between. Those who couldn’t make it were sorely missed. It was like a jigsaw puzzle without all the pieces.
They say that the more you care about something, the more you hurt when it is gone. Tonight was a wonderful time of re-connection. For one night, the movie continued. It was like watching bonus footage and deleted scenes. Another chapter was written in a book that hadn’t been picked up for years. The night was also sad. It was a night of magic that I knew would be short-lived. I found myself wanting more. More stories, more re-connection, more new memories to be made as old memories were reflected upon. I wanted more resolution.
The movie is a small part of a larger story that has continued through generations. It’s a complicated movie. Part drama, part suspense, part comedy, and part mystery. Very often it is a tragedy. There is even a touch of horror. It can be dull at times, but it also can be a captivating movie. It can draw you in and take hold of your heart. You can identify with the characters. After all, you yourself have a part to play.
Although it includes many genres, the movie is mainly a love story. It centers on one Actor sent by the Master Storyteller, who has relentlessly been at work to draw wayward mankind back to Himself. It’s a beautiful story, and it can take your breath away.
“He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the hearts of men; yet they cannot fathom what God has done from beginning to end.” – Ecclesiastes 3:11
Category: Musings
