Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs

November 5, 2012 | By | Add a Comment

I just finished a few days with my 5-year old niece. We spent a lot of time talking about one of her favorite subjects and soon to be mine: Princesses! As we discussed this fascinating topic, I realized that I am woefully inadequate in my Princess knowledge. So, I did some Internet research and found that there are 10 official Disney Princesses. In order to remedy my ignorance, I’m going to watch them all and share my discoveries as I go!

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0:25 – I’m doing these Disney movies in order. According to the bottom of the screen, this one came out in MCMXXXII. I’m pretty sure that was awhile ago.

1:49 – The Queen feared that some day Snow White’s beauty would surpass her own? Come on, women are never that jealous of other women. Hollywood…

2:00 – Ohhh! Snow White is the one about the mirror on the wall. It’s all coming back, all coming back to me now!

2:40 – This Wicked-Witch-Stepmother lady really is kind of creepy. Good job animators.

2:50 – This mirror is even creepier. I’m having nightmares tonight.

4:00 – So far, Snow White kind of reminds me of Julie Andrews from the Sound of Music – just a hard working common person kind of humming, doing chores and skipping around.

4:30 – After all these years since MCMXXXII, Snow White’s beauty holds up pretty well. I must say that she is quite lovely. Even the birds adore her.

4:51 – The first glimpse of the Prince and his horse! Seems like lots of these Prince guys ride horses. I should have attended my local 4-H club.

5:28 – Oh! Prince sings too! I can’t say I sing either. So far, I would never make it as a Disney Prince.

5:38 – Prince has already scared away Snow White! So much for Mr. Charming. Good thing he has such an undeniably irresistible voice.

6:30 – This movie is definitely in favor of love at first sight! One look and he is smitten. I guess that mirror was right about Ms. White’s beauty after all.

7:15 – What is this about Witch lady wanting to kill Snow White? I thought this movie was for children!?!

7:42 – Bring back her heart in a box? GOOD LORD! This witch is a crazy, bloodthirsty killer!!!

8:04 – Top of the morning to you Sound of Music Princess.

11:40 – Once again, Snow White proves herself to be remarkable great with animals. I bet she is good with children too.

13:30 – Snow White is a kind and precious Princess. I am hoping good things for her.

14:30 – Does Snow White have any friends besides animals? This is no way to live.

16:15 – With all these animals, Snow White is like a modern day Noah without the arc.

17:40 – Snow White cares for orphans and cleanliness. What is not to like about this young maiden?

19:20  – Snow White and her million animal friends will have this place clean in no time.

20:30 – Watching this movie makes me feel like a six year old girl all over again…

21:30 – Dwarfs!

22:20 – Look at all this shiny stuff the Dwarfs are mining. These Dwarfs must be friggin rich.

23:30 – The Hi-Ho song!!!

23:46 – There really are seven dwarfs. I counted.

24:40 – Snow White is using a candle. I guess they didn’t have electricity in MCMXXXII.

28:45 – I totally can’t tell which Dwarf is which. Can’t they wear their names on their belts or something?

29:45 – Okay, we have a Sneezy.

34:00 – I like Dopy. I’ll all for the little guy. Well, I guess they are all little…

35:20 – “She’s a female. All females are full of wicked wiles!” I don’t know what that means, but I totally agree!

36:00 – Her first interaction with the Dwarfs. Let’s see if Ms. White is as good with little men as she is with the deer and birds.

36:30 – These Dwarfs are adorable too. What is more adorable: Snow White, all the animals or the Dwarfs?

37:20 – Snow White has a sense of humor! What is this girl missing (other than a normal friend)?

38:55 – Snow White will wash, clean, cook. A true Proverbs 31 woman!

39:40 – This movie is getting a bit slow. I think the witch needs to make another attempted murder.

41:40 – They can’t eat unless they wash their hands? Think of all the children this movie must have brainwashed…

42:20 – Snow White is even kind to grumpy people! I honestly can’t think of one thing wrong with her. She really should have more friends besides animals and short people.

43:30 – What is Prince Charming doing all this time? We haven’t seen him since his little singing episode at the beginning of the movie. From what we know of him, he is probably riding his horse around or writing love songs.

45:00 – This movie is going nowhere. Things were really different back in MCMXXXII.

47:15 – If I go to the bathroom, will I miss anything? I don’t think so.

48:50 – The wicked Witch/Queen is back! Yeah baby, things are about to pick up!

51:15 – Witch Stepmom just transformed into a creepy looking old lady. She’s definitely not winning that “who’s the fairest of them all” mirror contest now.

54:40 – We’ve just found Snow White’s first weakness – she isn’t much of a dancer.

55:30 – I take it back. Snow White can groove.

56:45 – Everyone is so happy. Little do they know that they’re all about to die.

57:12 –True confession time!  Snow White is revealing her true feelings. She is opening up to the Dwarfs about how much she misses the Prince! She even called him charming – I guess his singing worked after all! I am really starting to care about this Princess. She’s singing: “Someday my Prince will come. Someday we’ll meet again. Someday when Spring is here, we’ll find our love. Wedding bells will ring… When my dreams come true!” I’m getting goosebumbs! It’s a moment!!!

100:40 – Before bed, Snow White prays: “Bless the seven men who have been so kind to me and please make my dreams come true” – Can’t say I’ve ever prayed the first part of that prayer in my life.

102:30 – Everyone is peacefully asleep. I hope they enjoy it before they all die in the middle of their sleep after being slaughtered by a zealous Witch wielding a steak knife.

109:30 – Snow White is singing about her Prince again. I can’t blame her. He is the only man in the entire kingdom as far as I can tell. Granted, he has a nice voice and rides a horse, but there really isn’t much competition.

115:30 – Why is this witch so concerned about being the best looking lady in the land? Haven’t we learned that there are next to no men around here?

117:14 – This witch is crazy!

118:00 – Snow White is dead. Witch is dead. Dwarfs are crying. Animals are sad.

120:15 – Prince Charming is singing again. We’ve seen him for about 45 seconds in this entire movie and he is either A) singing or b) riding his horse. Now he is c) kissing Snow White. This guy is really something. Gotta hand it to Mr. Charming.

121:15 – Snow White was brought back to life! Yeeeeaaaaah-baby! Go Prince with the horse and voice!

121:45 – Snow White is kissing the Dwarfs again. Lots of kissing all of a sudden!

122:20 – They are riding off into the sunset! They lived happily ever after!

122:52 – Thank God this is over. I am emotionally exhausted.

That’s 1 Princess down and 9 to go! So far, I’m limited in what I can say about Snow White, because I don’t have much to compare her to. My initial impressions are that she is kind, sweet and innocent but quite easily taken by men who ride horses and have sexy voices. We’ve also learned that her primary friends are forest animals and rich Dwarfs. We really can’t find fault with Ms. White, other than a brief moment of awkward dancing. We will attribute this to living in year MCMXXXII, when folks did thing differently. Though it is too early to say for sure, we think that Ms. White will end up being one of our favorite Princesses. She isn’t the most glamorous, but has a gentle spirit and unassuming way about her. As far as Princesses go, she is kind of an underdog and around here we like underdogs. Go Snow White. We love you!

Category: Princess Diaries

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